woooo!!!!!!!!!!! driving is freaking fun. i had my first lesson today. and the instructor was really nice. so wanna book him. but, i dunno la, weird system they have there. =( driving's not that hard as i thought it would be. the first time i moved the car, wooooo!!!! like a different feeling, never feel before. haha. ok do i sound kua zhang. but then very exciting la... haha. then i just drove round and round the circuit. the accelerator is the one that's hard to control. haha. cant wait to move on to the next stage! hopefully can get license by august?

hahaha.. so many things on my mind now... uni admission! i kinda have no idea where i wanna go. and even if i want, i bloody can't. =( my future is a blur.

I WANNA GO TO GENTING WITH TTB AND WX!

and so, i really got CCB. bloody... GP C. H1 geog D.

hai.

probably cant get into the course i want. but can get into uni i hope...

sigh. DEPRESSION.

thank God for one week hol next week. and family trip to hong kong! gonna book driving lessons. aim to finish learning by July.

this week has been interesting. staying over at jx's house, watched two movies. and burning my eye with some random contact lens solution. losing my phone in school, ended up finding it in the freaking toilet. cross-country yesterday. quite fun... at the dedication booth. too bad most of the songs cant be played.

sigh. there's gotta be more to life.

haha. 60 storeys! managed to conquer it. together with melvin. felt damnnnnnnnnnnn good after the climb. i wanna try again next yr!!

AHHHHH! THIS FRIDAY A LEVELS RESULTS! OMG. OMG OMG OMG. please please please. my dreams better not come true! at least CCB! not vulgarity. haha. hai. oh man..

what a drag. EXCITEMENT PLEASE.

just whack richalynn.

wo duo xiang ai ta.

tomorrow's the day!!! vertical marathon! haha. oh man. melvin and i are the number 2 couple to go up the 60 storeys! how exciting can this get. and there are only like 40 couples taking part. 40 couples!! i guess it would be really something if we can make it to top 5. i want!!!

move on.

really should move on.

feel damn stupid.

what the hell are we thinking. what the hell are we doing.

feel like such a loser.

just looking is enough to kill.

ran up 30 storeys today! twice. 4 mins and 5 mins. which is quite unbelievable. i really want this badly. right, melvin my lover! we can do this!!! 9 MINS! haha. vertical marathon. cant wait. SEE YOU AT THE TOP. come cheer for us this sunday 2nd march. lol.

and when the hell is the results gonna come out!!! argh. really cant wait already. i need to know how i did. so i have an idea, and i wont feel so floatish now.

maybe i should just heck care already and not think so much! this is anyway the last chance ever to live life anyhow. once uni starts, i dunno. yeah, make this year special. do all the crazy things in the world and ENJOY!!! be myself, be childish, be naughty. just whatever la and do how i feel.

i so wanna run up the mountains, play in the fields, and float on the sea. i wanna stand at the edge of the biggest waterfall in the world and jump down.

i really wanna relive the moment at the oxbow lake in sabah.

SIGH.

FUCK THAT BASTARD WHO TOOK OUR RABBITS AWAY!!!!!!!! i'm really so angry, so worried, so sad.

its really. FUCK HIM. die die die die!!!!

seriously. why!?!?!?!??!

you really had to steal them in the middle of the night. you really had to take the cage and everything away. you really had to bloody steal RABBITS. URGH.

just like that, gone forever.

i am so sorry...

SIGH.

i should really really really snap out of this bullshit, before i drown myself in a deep pool of embarrassment.

i should really really really work like an adult.

haha.

yeah, i should really make an effort to learn something from my job. and not just slack around. hai.

hai hai hai.

looking forward to

A levels results.

vertical marathon.

hong kong trip.

learning driving.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

i've been thinking a lot about what i wanna do after A's. and i think i'll be so damn happy after the last paper. i wanna read lots of books, play tales of symphonia, resident evil, and all the games i have in game cube, i wanna go cyling at pulau ubin, i wanna go to all the places in singapore i've not been to in a long time. i wanna catch up with all the people that i miss a lot. i wanna go back and play in alumni band. i wanna go overseas, wherever. I WANNA GO BACK TO SABAH. sigh. i wanna clean my room, and the house. i wanna learn cooking. i wanna work in the zoo. i wanna play lots of piano. i wanna have a nice family christmas, i wanna see the lights again. i wanna watch all the movies that i like and that i've missed. wanna watch oc, nip tuck, prison break, and all of it. i wanna climb mountains. i just want A's to be over soon. now.

NONE accomplished.

what the hell????????? this is so disappointing. haha.

sigh.

honestly, i actually dont enjoy working in bbss. for now. i dunno why but i'm just not happy there, generally. though it seems like we TAs have fun working together. and meeting new people and getting to know them is fun as well. but there's just something missing. something that feels BIG and should be there and with it missing, makes all of it empty. i really have no idea what the shit i am talking about. but this is a definitely must not happen in the future when working becomes life. SIGH.

depressed depressed depressed.

at least now i know this isnt for me. i think.

not office.
not teaching.

then what the fuck.

maybe like a mount kinabalu guide.

i should just relax, chill. like what mathangi always says.

self esteem is going down down down down down down down.

fuck it. fuck you.

and, thats enough. let it stay as there.

healthy lifestyle from now on. vertical marathon here we come!!!!!!!!!!!!!